Hi my name is Facebook

" Hi, my name is Facebook and I am probably THE larges social network on the internet. Myspace has got nothin on me! Course I cater and focus to high school and college/univeristy students, but lately I've got some hot brawds and older pimps makin their profiles and showing me the love. Hey, I have to say though, I REALLY don't mind. I mean, I've got some cougars jumpin at me, tellin all their friends about me, then they come into the circle and its like one big orgy party.

Anyways, before I get even more excited about them ladies, I've gotta brag about the millions of users all over the world that are a part of me. I'll tell you though, Im wayyy to cool for school. Pfftt, everyone would much rather look at me then at their lectures.Though I guess before I get even more self-righteous, which I am thank you very much, I'll tell you that I know everything and anything about anyone and anywhere. These people that are under my power, TOTALLY spill the beans in their little "notes." OH and in their events they post/attend, which I of course know about, means that I can TOTALLY go to and meet some more ladies.

Oh and DAMN, pictures can't forget them. No we can't. Pictures of ALL kinds. Pretty sexy I'd say. I'd say Im a pretty lucky fella. I've got strippers posted on peoples pages that I have VIP access to, none of this bullshit "can't see that, cant touch that" like you'd see in the strip clubs. Im too good for that. But I mean, seriously...I get to see people at their worst and at their best, drunk off their heads, hyper off the hizzie, in bathing suits..DAMN. I tell you, if I ain't a pimp, no one is.

So I've definetly got the inside scoop, the popular factor, and of course I'm a millionaire. I've got thousands of companies using me to try and get just as popularized, but I don't mind cause Im gettin' the cashola baby. Seriously though, millions of companies want their adds all over me cause Im THAT popular and they pay me shitloads. I mean do you know how much it costs PER second? A crazy amount that I GET. But thats top secret agent information. I love my power.

Oh and applications, hell what can I say about that. I mean, course they make my game a litlte slower, A LOT slower actually. I mean, I'll load Candy's page (my # 1 stripper picture on facebook) to stalk her a bit, but then she'll have all these applications that she keeps adding, from other people who keep uploading them onto my mainframe. Anyways, it'll take minutes upon minutes to load her page...and I kind of get jelous that all these random people have a part of them on HER page...but so long as I load her page and get a few seconds in, Im good. I don't really need that much time, get in and get out if you catch my drift ; ).

Anyways, like I said I my name is Facebook and I am a part of your life, your friends life, yeah even your pets lives, so get used to it cause I'm just that popular. Oh and while you're at it, on me I mean ; ) , remember that I'm watching your every move, and so is everyone else. But thats okay with me, cause I am JUST that popular. "

Hope you liked my little satiracle (can I call it that?) blog on Facebook. I do love fb don't get me wrong, but I mean it really is crazy how out of hand its getting. Leave me your thoughts.

Anyways, until tomorrow, put that hat on and go dance outside.

Cheers.